Saying Thank You and Sorry
The short English phrases for thanking and apologising — and how to reply when someone says them to you.
Say thank you for + a noun or an -ing form (Thanks for your help. · Thanks for coming.) and always reply — You're welcome. or No problem. Say sorry after something has happened (Sorry I'm late.) and excuse me before you do something, such as asking a stranger or passing someone. English speakers say both far more often than speakers of many other languages, and leaving them out can sound cold.
Saying thank you
- Thanks. — short, friendly, everywhere
- Thank you. — slightly more formal
- Thanks a lot. / Thanks very much. — bigger thanks
- Thank you so much. — warm, for a real favour
- Cheers. — British, informal, means thanks (not only a toast)
To say what you're thanking for, use for + noun or -ing:
Thank you for your help. · Thanks for coming. (not "thanks for come")
Replying to thanks
You must reply. Silence sounds unfriendly.
- You're welcome.
- No problem.
- That's all right. / That's OK.
- Not at all. (more formal)
- Any time. (warm, for a small favour)
Saying sorry
English uses sorry for two different things:
An apology — you did something:
Sorry, that's my fault.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Sorry about the noise.
Sympathy — nothing is your fault:
I'm sorry to hear that.
I'm so sorry. (when someone tells you bad news)
How big is the apology?
Match the phrase to the size of the problem — over-apologising for something tiny sounds odd, and under-apologising for something real sounds careless.
| Size | Phrase |
|---|---|
| tiny (bumping someone) | Sorry. · Oops, sorry. |
| small (being five minutes late) | Sorry I'm late. · Sorry about that. |
| real (a mistake at work) | I'm really sorry. · That was my fault. |
| formal (writing, or serious) | I do apologise. · Please accept my apologies. |
Note that I apologise is a formal, written phrase. Saying it to a friend you kept waiting sounds strangely stiff.
Excuse me and sorry are different
| Phrase | When |
|---|---|
| Excuse me | before you do something — asking a stranger, passing someone |
| Sorry | after something has happened |
- Excuse me, is this seat free? (before)
- Sorry! (after you step on someone's foot)
Also: Sorry? with a rising voice means I didn't hear you — please repeat. It is not an apology.
Replying to an apology
- That's all right.
- No problem.
- Don't worry about it.
- It's fine.
- These things happen.
A note on British "sorry"
In Britain sorry is used far beyond apology. People say it when you bump into them, when passing behind someone, when asking a question, and simply to soften a sentence: Sorry, could I just squeeze past?
None of this admits fault. Treat it as a social lubricant rather than an apology — and if someone says sorry to you for no obvious reason, the expected reply is just sorry back, or a smile.
Thanking and apologising are expected, not optional. In English these phrases mark the boundaries of a small social exchange, so leaving one out is noticed even when nothing rude was said. If you are unsure whether a situation calls for it, it almost certainly does — the cost of one extra thanks is nothing.
Small politeness that matters
Add please to requests, and English speakers expect it more than you might think:
Two coffees, please.
Could you help me, please?
Both, in thirty seconds
A: Sorry — is this seat taken?
B: No, go ahead.
A: Thanks. Sorry, could I just get my bag past you?
B: Of course. There you go.
A: Thanks very much.
B: No problem.
Two sorrys, neither of them an apology, and two thanks, both of them answered.
Test yourself
The quiz below checks which phrase fits which moment.